Scriptodemonology #2...

2. Sloth

Description:
A mighty demon indeed, Sloth takes a much longer view than most. It knows that as puny mortals, we only have a very short time before death or dementia takes us. And either will end the writer's travails. A thousand masterpieces may wait buried within us all and as every one passes that we now won't have time to write before the end, Sloth chuckles and gloats. How many hours spent in front of the television, how much time spent in banal conversations, how many eons spent enmeshed in the arms of sweet Somnus? If I end up going to Hell, (and the oddsmakers would most likely classify it as a sure thing) this would be the last demon I'd want to have meet me at the gates.

Powers:
Unlimited. Can make air around one thick and immovable, couches ridiculously comfortable, and eyelids impossibly weighty. Distorts time sense to hide its effects.

Vulnerabilities:
Ruthless ambition, deadlines, caffeine.

Instructions for killing:
Unknown.


Jason

P.S. Actually, I've been to Hell. They're gonna gave me a suite!!! }:)

Scriptodemonology #1...

What are the writer's demons? What are the things that stalk us, leeching our potential and dropping stumbling blocks in the path of our destiny?

1. Unconfidence

Description:
The chief destroyer. The one upon which many other demons depend for sustenance. Unconfidence in your work, in your vision, in your potential, in your talent. This is the basis for comments like, 'I can't write', 'Its just a little story', 'I could never show anyone my work', 'It just needs a little more work', and an infinity more. When the first cave painter (using male caveman arbitrarily) made his first drawings on the wall after a nice solid mammoth luncheon, it was born. It whispered in his ear, "ugh uggghus ghhfuu", or to paraphrase, "No one will like it. The chief will hit you with a stick. The women will reject you despite your strong odor. Hide it, destroy it." Maybe he listened. Maybe the first one to show anyone was the second or the hundredth. We'll never know now.

Powers:
Has the ability to sap energy and life directly. Enhances fear emotions to prevent action.

Vulnerabilities:
None, really.

Instructions for killing:
Impossible, only possible to suppress.


Jason

P.S. Stay tuned for further installments...

Siridiots...

You know, its actually quite amazing how much time is spent in writing (as in life) getting to know people. Our whole world is centered around them, in fact. You may consider them divine creations, or big-brained apes, or even alien experiments, but they're still the most important thing. Writer, retailer, police officer, serial killer, even a hermit (though they're primarily concerned with avoiding people). Everyone. Which is remarkable because most people are spectacularly uninteresting, and often pretty damned slow. It really is kind of a paradox. I love paradoxes. }:)

Here's an example of a couple of these points. I was downloading random movie quotes today, and found one from the incredibly, unutterably, ridiculously bad movie Piranha 2. If no one else remembers this screen gem, this was the one where the giant mutated piranha not only ruled the suburban lake, but also sprouted wings and flew around gnawing on people. The quote (in a .wav sound clip) was "C'mon now, people eat fish, fish don't eat people." Seriously. Isn't this just about the worst thing a person could say in this situation? I mean, doesn't this guy realize that the name of this movie is freaking Piranha 2!?!? Did he think he could get away with saying something like that? Idiot...

Jason }:)

P.S. Have you ever tried to step down a video game level? The other day I went from playing Tony Hawk 4 on the PS2 directly to playing Tony Hawk 3 for the PS1. Holy polygons, Batman!